How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Anything and everything about Thailand
Dodger
Posts: 1926
Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2010 2:58 am
Has thanked: 133 times
Been thanked: 479 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Dodger »

Gaybutton wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 3:40 pm You could probably even return the same night.
I tend to avoid sloppy seconds...or, thirds... 55555
User avatar
Gaybutton
Posts: 21459
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:21 am
Location: Thailand
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 1306 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Gaybutton »

Dodger wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 3:47 pm I tend to avoid sloppy seconds...or, thirds... 55555
If all the boy - the boy you are 'obsessed' with - was doing was sitting with the customer and then the customer leaves without taking the boy off, where does the "sloppy seconds" part come in . . . ?
fountainhall

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by fountainhall »

Gaybutton wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 3:22 pm Suppose you want the boy a customer is sitting with, but the customer more or less tells you to fuck off. What are you going to do then? Are you going to go away? Are you going to start an argument? Are you going to start a fight?

And what about the boy? Doesn't he get any say in the matter? Do you think he would want any part of someone making a scene?
I have never once seen what you describe happen - ever, over several decades! The mamasan will tell the customer that another customer wishes to off the boy. That customer is then given the option of offing the boy himself or releasing him after a few minutes to go with the offing customer. I have seen this happen so many dozens of times. Never an argument. Never any fight. Just a commercial decision made on the basis of cold hard cash.

As for the boys, I have yet to see any instance of one rejecting an off in order to sit with a customer who is only buying him a drink or two.
Dodger
Posts: 1926
Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2010 2:58 am
Has thanked: 133 times
Been thanked: 479 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Dodger »

Gaybutton wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 4:20 pm
Dodger wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 3:47 pm I tend to avoid sloppy seconds...or, thirds... 55555
If all the boy - the boy you are 'obsessed' with - was doing was sitting with the customer and then the customer leaves without taking the boy off, where does the "sloppy seconds" part come in . . . ?
I thought you meant the boy left the bar on an off and then returned. If all he was doing was sitting with a customer, the shows on, unless in fact he did one of those "jerk off in a glass" routines whilst sitting with the other customer.
User avatar
Gaybutton
Posts: 21459
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:21 am
Location: Thailand
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 1306 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Gaybutton »

fountainhall wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 4:39 pm As for the boys, I have yet to see any instance of one rejecting an off in order to sit with a customer who is only buying him a drink or two.
I have, although only once, and the customer deserved it. That was back in the old days of the Kaos bar in Pattaya. I still remember the boy, June. I'm not sure where this customer was from, but if you look up 'asshole' in the dictionary, you'll probably see his picture.

June was sitting with him. This man was groping and fondling him endlessly, right in front of everybody. It was obvious that June was embarrassed and didn't appreciate it. He had bought June a grand total of one drink. He was also taking out and displaying a large wad of cash. When it came time to tip June, one of the other boys signaled him - wanting to know how much this guy tipped him. June frowned and held up 2 fingers, meaning the man gave him a whopping 20 baht.

I got up and went right over to them while this guy was still sitting with him and I gave June 100 baht, right in front of the man. I called him a cheap bastard and returned to my seat. The man wasn't even slightly fazed about it. I'm not sure he even understood what I said, but he knew it wasn't good. He couldn't care less.

A couple days later I was back in Kaos. June sat with me and told me the man came in the next night and made an arrangement for June to go to his hotel room during the next afternoon. June went, only because he needed the money. When he arrived at the man's room, June knocked on the door. The man opened the door and told June he already has another boy with him. Then he shut the door in June's face. He gave June nothing, not even taxi fare.

This same man came in again while I was there. June was on the stage at the time and this man had the audacity to call June over to sit with him. I didn't understand what June's Thai language response was, but it must have been akin to 'fuck you!' and he refused to sit with the man. All the other boys applauded June and the man left. That was the last time I ever saw that guy.
Dodger
Posts: 1926
Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2010 2:58 am
Has thanked: 133 times
Been thanked: 479 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Dodger »

fountainhall wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 4:39 pm The mamasan will tell the customer that another customer wishes to off the boy. That customer is then given the option of offing the boy himself or releasing him after a few minutes to go with the offing customer.
With all due respect, I've never once, in 20 years of being totally submersed in Boy Bars, had a mamasan tell me that another farang wanted to off the boy I was with, and give me the ultimatum you described. If that had ever occurred, I would have never darkened the doorway of that bar with my shadow again. The mamasans and bar owners know this, thus the reason these types of incidents are extremely rare in my opinion.

I've encountered situations where I attempted to invite a boy off the stage, only to be informed by the mamasan that he couldn't join me because he was waiting for another customer to arrive. Disappointed as I may have been, this practice was perfectly understandable and acceptable. The mamasan knew full well that if the boy had joined me, and then left his seat next to me to join the other customer when he arrived, I would be extremely dissatisfied with the bar. The minute a boy accepts your invitation to join you for a drink, his service to you begins. Regardless if you off him or not, his responsibility is supposed to be directed towards you.

I would suggest that the reason you have never seen an instance of a boy rejecting an off in order to sit with a customer who is only buying him a drink, is because most farang (not all) follow the bar etiquette that I mentioned earlier, and abstain from making these types of advances towards a boy who's already sitting with a customer. It's my opinion that most farang avoid this type of manipulating maneuver and apply common decency when out on the bar scene. By "manipulating maneuver", I mean a person who attempts to use his money in a manner similar to a bribe, to disrupt the service being provided to another customer, for his own personal gain.

One of the very first things that amazed me about Thai Boys was their adherence to these ingrained work ethics that we're talking about. I sat at the old Euro Boy Bar in Sunee once and watched a young farang (30ish) with Brad Pitt good looks, giving this boy sitting down the row from me the constant eye. The boy at the receiving end was sitting next to a very elderly farang who was obviously drunk. The boy avoided Brad Pitt's smiles and stayed by the elderly farang's side the whole time I was there as if he was the most important person in the room. That fascinated me to no end.

I think we'll just have to respectfully agree that we disagree on this one.
fountainhall

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by fountainhall »

Dodger wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 6:02 pm With all due respect, I've never once, in 20 years of being totally submersed in Boy Bars, had a mamasan tell me that another farang wanted to off the boy I was with, and give me the ultimatum you described.
I don't doubt you for a moment and am happy just to disagree. But having been a regular in the Bangkok bars (although not those in Pattaya) for about 35 of the last 40 years I confirm again I have seen this happen many times. A few times even when I have wanted a boy who was merely drinking with another customer, and yet more times when I have been drinking with a boy and not sure if I really wanted to off him but I was told another customer was offering an off.

Frankly it never at any time bothered me. I accept the boys are in the bars to make money from offs. As someone said earlier, first come first served in the off stakes. Besides, although sitting next to a cute go-go boy was always pleasant I rarely found any guys in most of the bars who could hold any form of basic conversation when I bought them drinks. I suppose the volume of the music partly killed that notion. Solid was one of the few exceptions on both counts.
User avatar
christianpfc
Posts: 1507
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 9:26 pm
Location: Bangkok Sathorn
Has thanked: 329 times
Been thanked: 26 times
Contact:

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by christianpfc »

If I have offed a boy before and want to have sex with him again, it’s most likely that I exchanged contact information with him so I can get him directly before or after work in the bar.

However, the situation that I enter a bar with intention to off one particular boy, and that boy is sitting with a customer, has happened twice.

Once in Eros with a boy I had before. Either staff or the boy came to me and ask if I want to off him, to which I replied yes, and then told me wait a bit as the other customer is only there for drinking and chatting, which turned out to be true.

The other was in Kawaii, and I only chatted with the boy online before but hadn’t met him. He was sitting with a customer, and it looked like they were having fun and it would go on for a longer time, so I left after the usual time I spend in a bar (between half and one hour).

The boy recognized me and found our chat and sent a message to me soon after, saying he is sorry that couldn’t go with me. A good sign, and next time I got him, and he has become one of my regulars.

As I spend most of my time in Thailand and have been through many disappointment and deceptions, I'm jaded and would not engage in bidding on a boy, but leave him to the other customer. I can get the boy in one week, in two weeks, next month, in two months, whenever I want.

I have learnt that there is little commitment and loyalty in Thailand.

A German friend has two condos and one car in Thailand and a Thai boyfriend. If the Thai boyfriend met someone who has two condos and two cars, he would upgrade to that person. I would apply this Thai way of thinking here as well: what counts is not the past (previous customer of the boy versus new potential customer) or the future (one-time tourist or regular customer), but who is NOW offering the most money / buying the most drinks.
firecat69

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by firecat69 »

Constantly amazes me how someone who spends as much time in Thailand can be so ignorant of the boys he purports to hire. Anyone who has lived in Thailand including myself can come up with numerous boys who stayed with their farang BF even when the BF suffered sickness or money problems . I can think of a number of boys who were offered long trips and extras etc but they refused because they had a farang BF. I would be willing to bet that a few other long time residents or visitors could come up with similar stories.

In fact I once had a regular in BKK and we took short 3 night trips to Chiang Mai etc. He told me once a rich farang wanted him to go to Europe for a month but it was when we had a short trip planned to Cambodia. He told the farang no and I told him to get in touch and tell him trip fell through. He did and had a trip of a lifetime in Europe.

Of course what you say does happen but it is hardly the typical story of greedy Thai Boys that you love to spin!

Sad you have such a low opinion of Thailand and the boys you hire. I have to wonder why you don't find another country but I think I know!
Dodger
Posts: 1926
Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2010 2:58 am
Has thanked: 133 times
Been thanked: 479 times

Re: How Do You Feel When This Happens?

Post by Dodger »

christianpfc wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 11:43 pm If I have offed a boy before and want to have sex with him again, it’s most likely that I exchanged contact information with him so I can get him directly before or after work in the bar.

However, the situation that I enter a bar with intention to off one particular boy, and that boy is sitting with a customer, has happened twice.

Once in Eros with a boy I had before. Either staff or the boy came to me and ask if I want to off him, to which I replied yes, and then told me wait a bit as the other customer is only there for drinking and chatting, which turned out to be true.

The other was in Kawaii, and I only chatted with the boy online before but hadn’t met him. He was sitting with a customer, and it looked like they were having fun and it would go on for a longer time, so I left after the usual time I spend in a bar (between half and one hour).

The boy recognized me and found our chat and sent a message to me soon after, saying he is sorry that couldn’t go with me. A good sign, and next time I got him, and he has become one of my regulars.
In the first example, you were asked to wait because the boy was drinking with another customer.

In the second example, the boy recognized you, and apparently knew you were there to see him, but did not leave the customer he was sitting with.

Both examples describe the way things are intended to work in Boy Bars.
Post Reply