What's Wrong With This Picture?

[Undaunted]

You believe you're in a long term relationship with a Thai guy. All seems well except he gets phone calls that he seems to hide and he often says he is going to see his family, but his family is in fact a wife and kids.

[bao-bao]

Then the classification of both "relationship" and whether it's right or wrong are both up for grabs, I'd say. With so many of the guys being Gay for Pay the "double life" it doesn't sound quite so surprising. I've certainly heard plenty of similar stories from guys I've talked with.

[Alex]

Quite unlikely that I will ever have that particular problem. Most of my Thai relationships are that gay that they wouldn't touch a woman with a barge pole, let alone sire a child with one. And tongue in cheek I might add, I also don't find them in bars and focus on those who worship white d!cks.

[Bangkokian]

Most of my Thai relationships are that gay that they wouldn't touch a woman with a barge pole,

It could be that because of family or peer pressure they feel obliged to act straight even to the degree of 'fathering a child'.
Possibly the same in many illiberally minded countries or communities.

[windwalker]

If this isn't the case then it would be a major red flag...either his family isn't what you think, or his family doesn't know or doesn't want to know that he is gay and in any kind of a gay relationship.

There is another twist to that; the boyfriend is straight, not gay, and does not want his family to know about his relationship with a man.

[RichLB]

There is another twist to that; the boyfriend is straight, not gay, and does not want his family to know about his relationship with a man.

As an aside, it might be useful to note that current research is showing that the old gay-straight dichotomy is not very descriptive of human sexuality. Even the old Kinsey 6 point scale misses the current mark. It now appears that almost all people are ambisexual and social norms play a major part in the life style one eventually leads.

[Undaunted]

If this isn't the case then it would be a major red flag...either his family isn't what you think, or his family doesn't know or doesn't want to know that he is gay and in any kind of a gay relationship.

There is another twist to that; the boyfriend is straight, not gay, and does not want his family to know about his relationship with a man.

I think windwalker is correct, if those of us that prefer a straight acting, straight looking guy then it should be easy to assume that he has another life, and why shouldn't he, and if everyone is honest about whats going on, all the better.

[Up2u]

If this isn't the case then it would be a major red flag...either his family isn't what you think, or his family doesn't know or doesn't want to know that he is gay and in any kind of a gay relationship.

There is another twist to that; the boyfriend is straight, not gay, and does not want his family to know about his relationship with a man.

Then you have driven down a wrong way street, throw it in reverse or make a U-turn quickly.

[windwalker]

Then you have driven down a wrong way street, throw it in reverse or make a U-turn quickly.

In my case it is a two-way street; he can go his way and I can go my way.

[christianpfc]

You believe you're in a long term relationship with a Thai guy. All seems well except he gets phone calls that he seems to hide and he often says he is going to see his family, but his family is in fact a wife and kids.

This is illogical.
If the Farang understands Thai, he should be able to figure out that the boy has wife and children even the boy hides those calls.
If the Farang does not understand Thai, the boy doesn't have to hide these calls.

Furthermore, my problem is not my Thai friends hiding calls from me, but rather being on the phone, speaking or texting, more than I consider polite when you have company.